Trust

Realizing that the world is vastly different than I ever believed.
How did I ever have faith in the future, and where can I find that faith again?
I felt protected.
The world was what people told me to do, everything decided.
Now I am sort of floating.
I feel more loved than ever before in my life,
but also more scared.
Who do I want to be? How do I get out of bed? And where do I find happiness?
In a way I know the answers, I know what I am supposed to do, I just don’t know what I want.
Do I just need to give myself up?
Stop thinking “this is me,”
and just turn myself into someone who is searching. Enjoy the chase and watching the change.
Stop asking what the future holds and instead work on making it hold anything.
Stop fearing that there will not be anything for me to hold.
Trust.